Uruguayan star forward Luis Suarez is being accused of biting an Italian player at the FIFA World Cup.
In the Video replay it looks like he’s sinking his teeth into the Italian’s shoulder.
This is all wrong so here are the Doug & Wendy Tips for Eating Italian… First……You should never eat an Italian raw (although there are some exceptions). So, some tips on cooking Italian.
Be careful not to use an open flame. Italians are flammable. I think it might be the wine.
Try a sauce spicier than an Italian. Finding one may be hard. Do some research.
When in doubt, cover in cheese.
Always serve your dish on a table with a red and white checkered table cloth and a candle in an empty wine bottle with a wicker base.
When your guests are full, serve them two more courses followed by dessert.